This morning I received an e-mail that said the following:
Manuel quiere que seas su amigo(a) en hi5.
He creado un perfil de hi5 y quisiera añadirte como un amigo, para que podamos compartir fotos y empezar a construir nuestra red. ¡Pero primero es necesario que te unas a hi5! Una vez que participes en el sitio, tendrás la oportunidad de crear un perfil, compartir imágenes, y encontrar muchos más amigos.
Gracias,
Manuel
Wow. Manuel wants something, and it sounds important. I recognized a few words: amigos, fotos, red. He must want photos of a red friend. I’m not sure what else he wants, but it sure is nice to have friends.
I wrote Manuel back:
Dear Manuel,
I can appreciate that you’d like photos of a red friend. Or maybe you wanted photos that would make a friend turn red. In either case, I think you’ve turned to the right guy. Unfortunately, my Spanish is very limited, and I’m not sure the phrases I know will come in handy in this situation. I mean, after all, donde’ estas el bano? Es la verdad! Donde’ estas la salade de atun, Manuel?! Que? Queso? Que Queso? No quiero queso, Manuel! Y El Pollo Diablo! Aye, Dios Mio!
As you can see, speaking Spanish only serves to infuriate me, so I will atempt no further. If you wish to remain friends with me, Manuel, you’ll have to learn some English. I fear if we do not break this language barrier, our relationship will become strained and I’ve only just met you. I can see that you are also friends with Luisa Fernanda, Yeliandra, Carmen, Marilu, Hermes, and Nena, and I’m sure that they’re all very nice people. Maybe we can all get together sometime and hang out.
Your Semi-Monolingual Friend,
The Raging Tech